Day 20 路人甲

The connection sucks big time today. 

Do you ever have this person in your life? Someone you want to tell everything to but yet at times know you can't tell all of it to this person. You want to tell, all you can do is think of a way to tell it in a less direct way. I don't know how I manage to keep up with this. I worry too much about all the things that I want to tell to this person, same time, I want this person to know all, to know what I think, how I feel.

I know I've disappeared from the virtual world for a long period of time. Sorry about that. Shall write a something to make up for that :)

"路人甲! " she screamed in excitement! 路人甲 saw her, gave a slight sigh then put on a smile for her, like what  路人甲 always did. Was it a real smile or a fake smile? She had no idea, she didn't care less, all she cared for was that her smile when she see  路人甲 is real. 

"I have to tell you something!" she said again, chewing on some dried apricots as she spoke.  路人甲 stared at the packet of apricots in her hands, gave an unapproving cough, before smiling again. She laughed and put the apricots away, "I have to tell you!" she said again, the wind blew, her voice was caught up in the howl.  路人甲 looked at her in confusion.

"I can't hear you,"  路人甲 said. "the wind, it's so strong today."

"I said I," the wind blew again before she could finish. 路人甲 laughed, the wind wasn't friendly today. The wind was never quite friendly when it comes to them, in fact, the wind tried every way it could to spoil it for them every time they meet. She was frustrated. She had many to tell  路人甲, some which she had to hide under layers of soft lies, she can't bear letting  路人甲 knowing everything. What is she supposed to tell  路人甲 next time then, if she spoke all of them today?  路人甲 has a reputation for leaving whenever there was nothing else for  路人甲 to know. She was afraid of that. But today it seemed to make no difference as well. It was a different feeling.

"More stories on your sweetheart today, I suppose?"  路人甲 said with a slight yawn, looking at the watch. 

"Yes, are you in a hurry today? Do you have to go home to your wife?" she asked. 

"No, I don't have to go home to her anytime soon, but I am in quite a hurry. I have to go for work."  路人甲 replied the excited girl in front.

"I will be quick, I promise," she lied. This was one promise she always made and never meant to keep. 

"30 minutes, that's all I can give you today."  路人甲 said sternly. 

"30 minutes will be just fine," she lied again. Give her all the time in the world and it will never be enough. It will never be. "I argued with him last night, over the vacation."

 路人甲 lifted a brow. 

"He's mad now and I think it's the right time," she played with her hair.

"Right time to?"  路人甲 looked up from the watch.

"Right time to..." dump him she thought but she will keep that for another time, another time when she has really broken off with him, "give him back what I owe him."

"Yes, I agree to that."  路人甲 smiled, a dimple sinking in on the left side of  路人甲's cheek.

"I found the puppy you gave me at his place. He took it," she said.

 路人甲 laughed, " I told you he took it."

She looked away, "Yea, I should have known better."

"Oh, do show me his picture. I haven't seen his picture before,"  路人甲 asked.

She hesitated, the picture was in her purse, she needed a miracle, to cut off her face from that picture before  路人甲 can see it.  "Tomorrow? I don't have it now." If only there was a way to smudge her face off. 

 路人甲 looked at her. "It's in your pocket, I know you well. Show it to me."

She refused, but the purse dropped out. Her heart nearly jumped out as  路人甲 looked at it. Dear God, she prayed. 

 "I can't see his face,"  路人甲 laughed and gave her the purse back. She looked at it,  路人甲 wasn't lying, the picture had been changed. She felt relieved, God was on her side, thank You, God, she thought.

"Yes, he's ugly." she said. 

"It's 10 minutes past 30 minutes now, I really got to go."  路人甲 said, packing the suitcase. 

"Oh, please don't. I just need 5 more minutes, please." she knew  路人甲's weak spot.  路人甲 was kind.  路人甲's heart was as soft and as untouched as a rectangular tofu soaking in some chinese grocery stores. White and smooth, as pure as it can be, incapable of hurting someone even if it wanted to. Well, there's one way to be exact, only one way.  路人甲 had hurt her before using this way, the same way a tofu can hurt someone. Put in on the floor and let the person step on it. That person will slip and fall. In the end the tofu will get hurt as well, no doubt, but this is the only way it would hurt anyone else. She knew it because the tofu had slipped her a few times, and the tofu had the same bruises as she did. Sometimes the tofu is just unaware of it, that it had hurt someone, it is only after the tofu saw what it had done to others that it notices its bruise.

"Okay,"  路人甲 said. Looking at her once more.

"I like you," her heart spoke, but it was her mind's voice that was projected, "Thank you. Do you think I did the right choice?" she asked. 

"What do you mean?"  路人甲 was confused.

"I mean," she stopped. She didn't know what she meant as well. What was she thinking? "Nothing."

"Tell me, it must be something,"  路人甲 insisted.

She laughed, not because of  路人甲 but rather her own stupidity, "nothing."

"Fine, I need to go,"  路人甲 took up the suitcase. 

"No, wait. 5 more minutes please," she begged.

"Tell me what you were trying to say."

"I..." she thought, there must be something, what was it, "I mean..." she stopped. And her heart spoke again, "I mean I really like you," she gave her forehead a tight smack before her mind projected, "I mean ignoring him."

"Oh, that. Yes you are right, can I go now?"  路人甲 said.

She nodded. "Good luck at work."

"Thank you,"  路人甲 said before disappearing into the foggy woods. And there she was standing, looking at the back of this figure until it completely disappeared. 

"I wish you all the best, I am happy you found such a loving wife. I will smile too when I know you are smiling, please stay blessed," she said to the woods. Little did  路人甲 know it will be the last time this girl will appear in the woods. "Sorry,  路人甲." This girl has problems of hers she wished to keep away from you.